Shell Shocked

I have had a bad week.

This week is the first week of my practical placement at another school for three weeks.  That is not a bad thing in itself but it is when you consider the entire three weeks is unpaid and I need to support my family and I on our meager savings (read credit card) and it will affect us for at least 6 - 8 weeks.

Then, on Tuesday (game day for my in person game) I get a call telling me that my best mate  had "taken a turn" and been delivered to hospital.  Yesterday, two days after the event we find out his turn was actually a stroke and in a more serious turn of events he gets air lifted to Hobart (around 350 Km's away) so he can be looked after by specialists.  He is only just above 40 and it has come as a massive shock.

Been a little shell shocked since then.  Worried for him, wondering what it is all about.  Have also had no time really to blog in any form this week so the readership on the main blog is down which is annoying.

Life can be a pain in the ass.  Just saying.  That is the view from my window today.

Zeiken Black, Hypnotism and Me

Last night my wife and I went out to the Civic Centre in Burnie with some friends to see a stage hypnotist called Zeiken Black perform his "adult" (thus this post contains adult content) rated show.  It is the first time that I have ever been to see a hypnotist and I saw it as a fun night out.  We went to a "night spot (read fancy pub) beforehand that was pretty cool and was in high spirits when we arrived.

One of the guys I was with was very adamant that he wanted to be hypnotised prior to the event.  I was thinking that I was not a good candidate as I over think stuff a lot and my mind is always active, so not a great choice for a technique that requires a deep relaxation.

We get in, get seated and the hypnotist arrives.  He tells the audience that he is going to run some tests to see who might be a great addition to the 15 people he was going to hypnotise.  The first test is really a test of do you do what you hear or do you do what you see.  Now I did what I heard, as did my wife but as we looked around there were many, many people more that did what they saw and not what they heard.

Last nights promo poster

The second test was a visualisation test where you closed your eyes and visualised holding a heavy bucket in one hand and having your arm tied to a helium balloon for the other.  If you opened your eyes at the end and found your hands far apart then he said you were a good candidate.  Mine were pretty much the furthest apart of my group there.  He then called for volunteers from the audience.  My friend got up and I thought "What the hell" and went with him.

In short, I was on stage for the entire evening.  My friend that wanted to be hypnotised dipped out in the first comedy routine of playing imaginary instruments and that left me as the only male on stage.  I made a decision at that point to stay, and I became the focus of all the jokes set up for male participants, but that was all a part of the fun wasn't it?

So, here is what I was asked to do.

• Play imaginary instruments to music
• Watch different genre movies and react to them
• Whenever I heard the music for Johnny Cash's Burning Ring of Fire drag my butt around on the floor as if it were burning like a dog does
• Whenever I heard the hypnotist say my name I was to react as if I had an embarrassing erection and try to cover it up
• Pretend I was a karate expert and perform moves that were similar to another person being a karate expert
• Imagine I was driving my fantasy car
• Come up with a porn name ("The Hammer" if you were wondering) and audition for the role with a chair
• Shake hands with the hypnotists assistant and experience the most intense orgasm I have ever had.

I believe in hypnotism wholeheartedly.  I have investigated it when I was younger and watched people like Derren Brown and come to believe that this is a true state.  Do I think last night that I was hypnotised?  No.

I think back on it now and what Zeiken (who ran a good fun show by the way) did was offer us a social contract from the word go.  The first test, do what you hear, not what you see was a test to see if he could get people that would listen to instruction.  Simple and important.  The second test of the bucket and the balloons was a test to see who would best act out what they were told to visualise.  Again, important and simple.

Once we were all on stage he took us into the "hypnotic" state!  There was a lot of soothing music and showmanship, although he claimed that it was all about us, but it was aimed to get us relaxed.  During this time though he furthered his social contract with us.  He told us that if we at any time felt like we were not hypnotised or "under" that we could sit and wait for him to release us from the stage.  This is the out clause and pretty much he is saying "if you think this is going to be too ridiculous you can leave."  He also told us that once we left that we would no longer be under the effect.  Important if you are a believer.  He also gave us some benefits to look forward to or our reward that being hypnotised allowed you to feel like you had a deep sleep and you would feel better.  The relaxation technique he took us through was bound to help with that.  He also told us that we would not believe that we were hypnotised and if asked we would say no.  A good technique to say that there is some control even though you don't feel it.

I was out on the town and I was there to have a bit of fun.  When my friend left (he later stated "I just did not feel hypnotised") I knew I was the last man standing and really nothing the hypnotist asked was having a go at me at my expense, it was just entertainment for a full house that had shown up.  I was fine with it.  Do I believe others there were hypnotised, yes.  There were some people completely out of it.  Some were disoriented afterward and cold not understand the laughter and the applause when we left.

I followed cues and played roles.  Never did I believe for a second that I had an embarrassing erection, and nor did I experience the most intense orgasm of my life whilst shaking his assistants hand.  I was very calm and relaxed though and he did a good job at maintaining that.  The whole sleep routine that he did (and all hypnotists do) is to keep us in that relaxed state.  I never believed for an instant that I was under control doing any of the things that he asked me and I still maintain that I was in full control and just decided to go along for the ride and have a good night.

There were distinct moments of panic in it too.  When asked to come up with a porn name I was so very glad he started at the opposite end of the line as all I could think of was Dirk Diggler who I thought was an actual porn star (turns out it is a character of a porn star in Boogie Nights, apparently I don't know porn).  So when he was nearing me and I was listening to some of the other responses, "The Hammer" came to me.  It was short, powerful and funny but it was my invention.

At the end of the show Zeiken told us all that we would feel energised and he wished us to be happy and confident after coming out of it.  I thought that was a great way to finish it and for the rest of the night as I tried to convince all of my friends that I was not actually hypnotised I felt just that.  Happy, energised and confident.

We went back to the bar for a couple of after show drinks and it was funny to see a few people from the show call out to me about "The Hammer" and one guy even offered to buy me a drink because I had made them laugh so hard.  Perhaps that is where the confidence and happiness comes from.

This morning I had to get up and go to my 12 hour shift at the service station.  I only got around 4 and a half hours sleep but I do still feel energised, happy and confident.  Every Saturday on my way to work I get a coffee from the local bakery and the girl that served me was amazed at how happy I seemed.  I mentioned the show and talked to them a bit.  

I have a sore bottom (from scooting around on the ground all night) and sore legs from the same.  But I am happy and in a better head-space than I have been for a long time.  So was I hypnotised and am I reacting to his suggestion to be happy, confident and energised?  Or is it a case that I am still just on a high from having a great night out with a lot of fun and friends.  I choose the latter.

But, there are other things to consider.  I am firmly in the mind-space that I was not hypnotised and did everything out of choice.  The fact remains though that although everything that was going on around me was good fun and funny, I did not need to laugh until I was told to respond in that manner.  The crowd was something that I did not react to because of this calmness.  Also, when entering the "hypnotic state" he asked us to test the weight of our eyelids and not open them.  I firmly believe that I could not have opened them if I tried at that point.  So I will always have a little doubt (perhaps 5%) that I actually was hypnotised.  Who knows!?

Anyhow, that is the view from my window this morning.  Thanks for reading.

Media Makes Me Sick

I don't mind watching a game of Australian Rules Football (AFL) when it is on the telly and certainly like watching it when my team plays but tonight (and the past few weeks) the coverage has irritated me like nothing else.  Why?  Wayne Carey.

For the American's that watch this blog a little bit of an explanation is required.  Wayne Carey used to be centre half forward (and full forward sometimes) for North Melbourne in the late 90's.  There is no secret that he was a great player in his time and he was known as the King.  Toward the end of his career he was in a massive scandal as he was caught having sex with his best mates wife (I believe he was married at the time also),  he moved to Adelaide but pretty much gave up the game at that time.

He was also arrested and plead guilty to indecent assault for grabbing a girls breast on the street and telling her to "get a bigger set of tits".  He was known to involve himself with known mob bosses and then when holidaying with his wife in Las Vegas he was caught on a misdemeanor for belting up his wife.

After that he then left his wife six weeks before his daughter was born to move in with another woman who then had him charged for domestic abuse.  Later on he then glassed (with a broken glass cut his girlfriend) the same woman and a year later admitted that he had been for a long time addicted to cocaine and alcohol.

So we have a drug addicted alcoholic, woman abuser who the commentary team believe it is OK to have making expert advice.  I am sorry, but this guy should never be given spotlight ever unless of course it is to show what sort of craven loser he is.  It makes me sick every second of air time they give him and the network should immediately cancel his contract and let him go back to whatever gutter he crawled from.

What an asshole.  It is OK to give second chances but this guy has had more chances than a cat that likes to chase tyres.  And what sort of message does this send young men?  It is OK to beat up your girlfriend, take drugs and grope girls whenever you want if you play sports.  You will still be a success. When will the sporting community finally realise how this looks to the community.  This man is forever tainted and should not be given opportunities like this.  Get rid of him.  That is what it looks like from my window anyway.

Thanks! And A New Tattoo?

Well, I was humbled after my last post.  I had received the news from my Doctor that my Type 2 Diabetes was going from diet control to medication and I hate that it came to that but it was my fault because I never changed my ways.  I asked last week for help on how to handle this and change my ways and I was amazed at the response.  Heaps of people gave me advice and one person even drove to my work that day and dropped me off some books for low GI information.  Thank you all.  It meant a great deal to me.

The first tattoo

Just to update on that front before I talk about my new exciting news, I have been eating much better than I have been and over the past two weeks this has meant that I have now dropped 7 Kilograms just from eating better.  Walking is on the cards too but I am scouting for locations as in Winter walking on my road is a messy affair.

O.K.  Good news people!  I waited 40 years to get my first tattoo, largely because my Mum hated them and my wife is (was) not a fan too.  Mum passed away around 4 years ago now and my wife gave me permission to get a tattoo for my 40th.  Got my Dragon tattoo that I am all happy with and my wife also seemed to like.  A lot in fact.  So much so that I asked about my second tattoo on Thursday and before the night was out she had a design she liked for me to look at!

So it looks as though I will be getting a new tattoo in the near future!  I am not releasing any designs just yet but I think it will be a back piece.  And by back piece, I mean it will take up a lot of the real estate across my shoulders and down to the base of my spine.  I have a design in mind and am going to have a go today at getting it down on paper but I am a crap artist so in the long run the tattooist is likely going to have to draw something up.  Hey I can at least try anyway!

I wont give too much away at the moment but I will say that it is going along with a theme.  Anyhow, less typing and more drawing!  See if I can come up with the masterpiece I have in my mind's eye.  Such is the view from my window.

So, how does one go about a lifestyle change?

Diabetes medication my friends.  That is what now sits on top of the freezer and is taken once a day.  Type 2 Diabetes that used to be controlled by diet (bwahahahahahaha) has now advanced to the stage where I need to take medication.

I hate medication.

So, the only way about this is to have a lifestyle change and eat good stuff.  Perhaps even exercise?  Alien words.

That cartoon looks familiar...

I have been trying to do some research on what to be eating and what is low GI etc. but the truth of the matter is that most websites that Google throws at me are very evasive in providing answers.  They love to give me links to pages that will just cost me a little bit of money to find out and all I have to say is screw that!

There appears to be a whole little industry that has arisen around Diabetes that try to screw the victim out of cash and I don't like it.

So what I am asking from people that take a look at this post and who may also be a Diabetes sufferer is where do you go for information?

I have to say that in the past few days I have been eating what I think is low GI (Glycemic Index) foods and they are filling me up so I am not really snacking in between meals.  And because my wife wanted to go for a drive yesterday we got stuck at take out and it made me feel ill so hopefully these are good signs.

Also, are there people out there who have achieved the whole lifestyle change thing?  I am wondering how hard it is to change not only your own lifestyle but your families as well.  My wife almost sneers at me when I say I can't eat something that previously I would gulp down and I want to know how to win her over.

Anyhow, that is what you get for being a lazy couch potato and give up sport or outside activities.  Such is the view from my window this morning!

Getting Organised

I am a terribly organised person.  It is a funny thing because people tend to think I am super organised.  With my blogs, full time work, a part time job,  part time university and gaming everyone seems to get the idea that I am on top of things as a whole.  The truth can not be further from that reality.

Truth is that I work well under pressure and so I tend to leave everything to the last minute.  While I know that this is what I do, sometimes it bites me badly in the bottom.  Like this week when I had to have an assignment due and when it came to the day I was hit by a bout of man flu.  means I have to take a big hit to my score and it is my fault.  No one else to blame, totally my fault.

The true view from my window is guarded by the evil cat Onyx...

I also looked at the things that I have lined up to do and realised that this style of approach (leaving things to the last minute) is unsustainable.  See, I have three reviews to do on products for the other blog.  Each of these is going to actually contain an interview with people at the companies.  I have three more assignments due soonish, a game every week (sometimes three) and also have to fit time in for the family and my part time job.  Not to mention continuously thinking about my teaching role.

So I have to get organised.  I have begun to use my calendar a bit more in an effort to keep me up to date with what I am doing, need to be doing and where I need to be.  One of the things that I am looking at is Google Calendar in line with my Linux distribution.  Problem is that I am having troubles syncing the calendar on to my phone (being an iPhone) and I tend to use my phone a lot to remind me what to do.  Apple in their brilliance decided that Linux was not to get the iTunes application for us.  Apparently they hate us!

So I have two weeks off from my teaching job as we ended Term 1 today.  In that two weeks I intend to get organised.  I will explore my options as it comes to calendars, scheduling and work required.  I will attempt to set up schedules (I shudder at the thought, I hate lists and schedules) and also some form of rewards for me to use to keep me on track!  If anyone out there in reader land has some ideas for me I would love to hear them.

Anyway, that is what the view is like from my window today!

I Wanted to Be A Journalist When I Grew Up

Thank goodness I dodged that bullet.Seriously though, media has become as dirty a word as lawyer or politician these days.  In all honesty I wanted to be an author when I grew up but my ever practical father advised me that I needed a second job to be an author and if writing was my game then I should look at journalism.

Throughout high school my entire life revolved around learning shorthand, studying English, getting work experience with the local paper and radio station so that I could achieve this goal.  Once I had achieved that I was a short jump to an author and I would have it all.

Grumpy Old Man!

Of course it never happened, as so many childhood dreams fail.  But I am glad of this fact.  I sit and watched the news this morning, something I try to avoid doing, and I got so angry at it.  I no longer read papers, watch the news or in any way attempt to catch any sort of update in the world due to the nature of the reporting these days.

When I was focused on becoming a journalist I learnt that it is the role of the reporter to present an unbiased and accurate picture of what was occurring.  It was not the reporters role to offer commentary or pass judgement on any particularly news worthy story that they become involved in.  This morning though I sneered at the TV as the media did what it tries to do all the time.  Make up a story where one should not exist.

Australia is heavily involved in the search for the missing Malaysian Airlines plane.  Strangely enough this costs money to send out search vehicles and people to pilot them.  So the media did this morning what they always do when a story is stalling, try to create controversy.  "It's costing us a million a day!"  "Why should we foot the bill?"  "Malaysia must pay!"

Piss off media.  Pull your head in. Every person in Australia would just love to have this at a resolution.  We would like to help all the people out there find out what has happened to the missing plane.  This is peoples lives.  If their were some cute 18 year old blonde haired, blue eyed surfer girl from Brisbane on that plane this would not even have been an issue.  These stories would never have surfaced.

The media is a money making machine.  It creates news if it has none.  reporters are now largely expected to add their own point of view making it no longer news but opinion.  In the future they will look back to the news agencies and what will they think of us then?

If you want to have an opinion, write a blog or go on a talk show.  If you want to report the news, report what happened.  Not your opinion on what happened.  There is no integrity to being a journalist anymore.  My Aunty, as we walked from the court after hearing the coroners report on my brother said to my mother and I as a woman from the paper came to talk to us "Come on, that scum is a journalist".  That was five or six years ago now but I know now exactly what she meant.

Such is the view from my window today!